Tiny Things

When we moved into our Brooklyn apartment a couple years ago, it seemed perfect: quiet, spacious, and close to the park. But no apartment is perfect, and as it turns out, this one has a serious pest problem. I don’t want to gross you out, but I think it’s important to raise awareness about tiny gnome infestations.

First I found them in the kitchen playing with the toaster.

I thought it was a one-time thing, but then I discovered they had gotten into my cereal. Yuck!

When I found them in my desk drawer, I knew this problem wasn’t going away.

In fact, they seem to be making a special effort to do naughty things.

I can’t even wear my favorite shoes anymore.

Now that they’re using our toilet as a swimming pool, I’m thinking it’s time to just move out.

I admit that I may be to blame for our tiny gnome problem—it’s possible that a couple of gnomes that I knitted escaped into the walls and multiplied, but there’s really no way to trace where they came from. The point is that you should get your home checked for tiny gnomes today, before it’s too late.