Unfortunate Prints

As any reader of crafty/design-y blogs knows, there are more gorgeous fabrics available now than ever before. On the other hand, all the yummy selections stocked in fabric stores these days make the not-so-beautiful prints stick out like a crooked hem.

What’s that dry riverbed of smooth stones doing in a craft store?

stonefabric

Oh, look again—it’s actually fabric printed with a stone pattern. Clever!

Suggested use: curtains in a rental cabin in the woods that smells like mildew.

Have a sporty friend who also prides him or herself on being politically correct? I have just the fabric for your next oven mitt gift for him or her.

marathonfabric

I guess this print is just a little too… sweaty for me to want to get close to.

And lastly, don’t forget the popular movie tie-in fabric that your kid has been begging for.

jackfabric

Actually, any kid I know would be begging for his parents to burn the creepy new Captain Jack Sparrow blanket and make the nightmares go away.

7 thoughts on “Unfortunate Prints

  1. Just started reading your blog a couple of weeks ago. I had to tell you this post made me laugh right out loud.

    In defense of the stone print, if you were making an art quilt with some kind of scenery and you wanted to… no. You really should use something more abstract. You’re right. These are all unfortunate.

    Thanks for the chuckle!

  2. Now if Johnny Depp’s face were printed on that, I’d buy ALL of it ;) Just when I think you thought of everything, along comes Tubby!-I.Can.Not.Wait.

  3. I actually like the stone print, but you are right on the money with the other two. Though I think my mom has used fabrics like the marathon one. She would cut out the individual motifs and then applique them onto a more interesting quilt background. I think she did that with some psychedelic cow fabric.

  4. Oh, gawd. That is *sew* sad (get it?!), given how much I ADORE Capt. Jack. {{sigh}} But I did like the curlique print on TOP of the stones. Does that count? Thanks for the giggle.

  5. You could put them all together and make the Ugliest-Ever-Made quilt. Mmm snuggle snuggle. lol.

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